Unedited Version
Growing up with a disability was difficult, and I never felt normal, but what is normal anyway? When I was younger, I experienced bullying due to having cerebral palsy, and it impacted me greatly. Cerebral palsy is a condition marked by impaired muscle coordination (spastic paralysis) and/or other disabilities, typically caused by damage to the brain before or at birth.
As an adult, I have questioned: Will I ever have a relationship and learn how to communicate because I have trust issues that I need to deal with because bullying has left an imprint on me, always feeling less than the next person?The first relationship I had failed, and I blamed myself as I was growing into womanhood. It's so much pressure. Even though I have a physical disability, I want to be seen as a human being instead of feeling less than a woman. Also, dealing with an anxiety disorder, on top of cerebral palsy, I realized the importance of taking care of myself, which is why I began therapy. I had to face my childhood trauma of being bullied and present issues to deal with the unedited version of myself. I am learning my triggers, coming to terms with the woman I am becoming while embracing my flaws.
I shared my story with you in hopes of encouraging you to face your truth, past, and flaws and deal with the unedited version of yourself. Cerebral palsy has shown me how to accept myself fully and to not be afraid of living just due to the fact of my physical disability. God has shown me that I can get through anything with Him, and He's all around me even when He's silent. God is there with us, always!
There are a lot of changes and challenges in life. I have to be patient with these parts of life that are still unfolding for me. I have to speak life into situations, speaking and believing, I will have everything that I desire because I am speaking it into existence, and I am not rushing my story's timeline just letting the Author hold the pen to write a beautiful outcome. Just as God is meeting me where I am, I believe that He will do the same for you. Allow God into your journey and believe that how you start is not how you will finish. It will be a beautiful outcome for us all.
"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." Romans 8:28 NLT
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