Candid Talk Interview With Brelyn Bowman!
Brelyn Bowman is a preacher of purity, a fashionista, an author, and the wife to Gospel Recording Artist, Tim Bowman, Jr. You may have seen them on Entertainment Tonight, Radio One, The View and many other television and radio networks, spreading a powerful message to everyone that LIVING LIFE FOR CHRIST CAN BE DONE AND WITH STYLE!
Brelyn is only 23 years old, but she is wise beyond her years. When Brelyn and I first started our conversation, I noticed quickly in the conversation that she is not just beautiful, but she is sweet, and VERY HUMBLE! Her humble spirit makes her even more beautiful because she understands it is not about her, but it’s about God!
In this exclusive interview, I spoke with Brelyn to discuss her passion for fashion, the purity certificate that she presented to her father during her wedding reception, and the steps she had to take throughout the years to remain a virgin.
CW:
You have been the owner of Breezy’s Boutiques for 5 years now. Being the daughter of a Pastor, especially in the church, we talk about women being modest. How do you balance out being so fashionable, but modest at the same time?
BB:
Well, growing up I've always had a thing for fashion. I've always had a passion to be unique and different and wanted to be out of the box. Having that background, that passion of it I wanted to make it known that it's okay to be saved, fly and cute all at once. A lot of times, like you said, people think you have to be modest, but that doesn’t mean you need to wear a skirt all the way down to your ankles or your whole face has to be covered. I knew that wasn’t for me. I can find a way to be modest, classy and fly at the same time and still love Jesus.
CW:
That is so amazing that you were able to be fashionable and still have integrity in being grounded in God’s Word at the same time. So, shifting towards being a virgin and the purity certificate, I wanted to talk about what it was like in your household growing up. Did you have friends who were on the same page as you when it came to not having sex?
BB:
One thing that I learned being in the household where the environment is so prone to honoring God is there are certain things you just cannot get by with (laughs). My parents were constantly teaching me the Word of God, and not only teaching me, but showing me the lifestyle that they lived daily. A lot of parents do a lot of talking, but they don't do a lot of living! If you don't do a lot of living, kids are not going to listen to the talking that you do! I learned that more is caught than taught. The more you do something, the more people are going to see, but if you talk about it, chances are, okay show me the proof. I want to see it. I learned that at a young age and really growing up and getting out on my own that right doesn't want to be around wrong and wrong doesn't want to be around right (laughs). Sometimes right may look like they want to be around wrong because wrong is experiencing life, but at the end of the day, right really comes out on top!
CW:
Right (laughs)! But people love blaming the devil for their actions when it’s outside of God’s will, you know. This is why I think it is so important for people to identify their triggers. While you were courting Tim, how did you establish early on your triggers?
BB:
No Netflix and Chill at all. This is so good because I even talk about that in my book. How a lot of people don't identify those triggers. In the beginning, I knew that I wasn't so desperate to be with somebody that I would compromise my triggers and compromise my standards. Because I knew, okay God at the end of the day, Your promise is to me that You will fulfill the desires of my heart if I delight myself in You. I have been delighting myself in God for a while. I said, "Listen Lord, I'm not desperate or I'm not pressed but definitely in a couple of years you're going to have to send somebody" (laughs). What I did was, I sat down with Tim and I told him, we're not going to do this, we're not going to do X, Y, and Z. I always hate to say what worked for me and what didn't work for me because people try to balance that for themselves and everybody has to know what works for them, but Tim and I couldn't kiss. Kissing didn't work out for us. We understood if we do this anymore this is going to go further than what we can handle. We had to decide that kissing is not important to us. It's more important to us to honor God than to kiss.
CW:
So, how did you know Tim was the one?
BB:
One way for sure I knew Tim was the one is because I asked him for something. It was something like a material thing, nothing big, but he told me “NO”, I was like WHAT? Nobody tells me NO. Not my father, the guys I've dated, nobody (laughs). I realized in that moment, if he can start off this strong, there's a possibility that he could be the one. I always tell people, it had nothing spiritual to do with it. It wasn’t anything really deep (laughs). It wasn't anything like that! I don't play with God and I don't play with the Word. I love the Word. I really knew on the spiritual end that Tim was the one when we really started aligning and our purposes started just going together where it was undeniably God. Where it's some moments where you say, "Okay, yeah God that's you" (laughs).
CW:
Okay, so the famous purity certificate that you presented to your father at the wedding reception, I know in your book you stated that your father did not say, "When you get married, I'm going to need you to go to the doctor and get checked out". You wanted to do this to honor your earthly father as you did your spiritual Father, but I know you were not expecting all of the shade! How did you handle the negativity surrounding your story?
BB:
Right. Good question. First, again let me say that my father definitely DID NOT make my sister and I do that! My sister and I, you just have to know us. We are so over the top! We like to do stuff extra and beyond. Let's push the mark, let's just be great. When I went, my doctor actually told me, “I can count on 1 hand how many people come in here to have this done”. I was just like WOW! That’s pretty cool (laughs)! As many patients as she sees, to be on that “1” hand was pretty awesome! With that being said, the first page that posted was the Shaderoom!
CW:
Yes, and it was ALL shade!
BB:
Yep (laughs), they posted all shade. We landed from our honeymoon and our phones went crazy. They just went off over and over probably 40 text messages. It was like did you see this? Did you see that? At first, I thought somebody had died. I thought something was wrong.
Tim and I, in that moment, he said, "Babe, this is the moment that you decide how you're going to build your character". For me that was such a pivotal moment because we had a choice to either show people the love of God or show hate and clap back. In that moment, we decided to show people the love of God. Because a lot of people, when someone attacks you, your first thing is let me attack back. In that moment, we turned the other cheek. We said, "You know what? Forget what they're saying. No matter what they're saying we know what we did honored God".
We didn't even look at people as haters. We looked at them as people who didn't understand what we did. Our thing was, if we could just get the conversation started that's all we needed. We want to talk about Jesus. Let's talk about what we did.
CW:
Well you two definitely started the conversation and in a big way! “Make Jesus Famous” (laughs)!
BB:
Right. Our hashtag was "Make Jesus Famous" because if we could just get the word out about what we did and why we did it to honor God ... Not to say that Jesus isn't famous but to do our part and to go in the Earth and to spread the love of Jesus.
CW:
Yeah. I know you said that you travel a lot and so does your husband, but I was listening to another interview that Gospel Recording Artist J. J. Harrison and his wife Trina were on discussing their marriage. Trina spoke on the importance of traveling with her husband to every place he has to go and I know family is really big for you. So, how do you handle your husband being gone so much? I'm learning that even in ministry, everybody that's in ministry motives are not good and people may not want to believe it, but there are groupies waiting for gospel artists as well just more so indirectly than directly.
BB:
I can't tell you how much I trust God. A lot of people put their trust in their spouse and put their trust in other people and I don't. I put my trust in God, and at the end of the day, God is obligated to take care of me.No matter the decisions that Tim makes. No matter the decisions that other people make. I put my trust in God and God is going to protect me.
That's why I'm able to not always travel with him because it's like, "Okay God, whatever he does I trust You". Then ultimately Tim is filled with the holy spirit And he trusts God as well. That's why the bible says, "Do not be unequally yoked". You're looking at somebody who's not filled with the holy spirit and they're in those tempting moments when the groupies are at the hotel. Holy spirit is not there ...
I trust God. I trust that God will be able to encourage, keep him and do whatever he needs to do on that end because I honor God with me life. I try as much as I can to go with Tim everywhere, but I just can't. I just can't do it.
CW:
Wow! We could literally end our conversation right here because you just said a mouthful! Okay, so your book, "No Ring, No Ting". What inspired you to write the book? Was it prior to you even meeting Tim that you were like, "You know God, I have this awesome testimony and I just want to encourage others", or was it once you started courting Tim that you wanted to write the book?
BB:
No, I always had this book in mind. I didn't know the title. I didn't know when it would come out or anything like that.
"No Ring, No Ting", it happened so perfectly where God was just like, "Okay, you are in a position to do this now. I want you to do it now". In the moment I started writing, things just started to come back to me and I would remember a certain moment in my life. I always talk about how people talk about the consequences of having sex, but they don’t talk about the benefits of not having sex.That was one of the things that God really gave me. "I want you to show people the fruit of this lifestyle of honoring Me". That's one of the things I love about our story. It didn't go viral or things didn't pop off until we actually had the fruit of God's goodness.
CW:
So, from that perspective is there anything that you can say to encourage readers? For both those who are virgins and are struggling to hold out, and then to those who are not virgins, but have made the decision to honor God, what would you tell them?
BB:
To the virgins, who are in that deciding moment where you’re trying to figure out what's really good, is this really something I should be doing? Trust me. It's worth it. To the one who feels that they let God down, it's not too late. Listen, God is married to the backslider. He loves you. The one thing I love is God is waiting there for you with open arms. He's like, "Baby, you can come back. I love you". He's like that really good father where you just need that one hug. If I could just get this one hug, this one touch. That's how God is! He's so loving, He's so forgiving, and He’s so comforting. When He’s like, “I got you, all you have to do is Repent! Turn away from those things and get back into the Word, get back to loving Me, get back to hearing Me. I got you".
If you would like to read more about Brelyn or support her ministry, click on her book which is located in the advertisement section, and SUPPORT her! “No Ring, No Ting” will bless you and keep you encourage on your journey because you can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens you!
